Why Date?

Why is Dating So Important for Marriage?

• Dating allows the couple to unwind from the stresses of life, therefore letting them reconnect and affecting their families for the better.

“Family stress caused by a couple’s failure to connect can also affect the well-being of their children. Our studies show that children raised in homes with a high level of marital hostility have chronically elevated levels of stress hormones.” –John Gottman, The Relationship Cure 

• Dating creates a chance to renew the relationship and establish a bond of friendship,

“Studies show that people with good friends usually have less stress and live longer. They have better health, higher resistance to infection, and stronger immune functioning, and they recover more quickly from illness.” –John Gottman, The Relationship Cure 

• Dating gives the couple a chance to share an emotional (and sometimes physical) connection necessary to marital success.

“Whether people are struggling to save a marriage, to cooperate in a family crisis, or to build rapport with a difficult boss, they usually have one thing in common: They need to share emotional information that can help them feel connected.” –John Gottman, The Relationship Cure  

•  When couples spend time together and get to know one another, they are able to rekindle their love for one another, thus deterring them from reaching divorce.

“Based on our research, I believe that failure to connect is a major cause of our culture’s high divorce rate.” –John Gottman, The Relationship Cure 

• When couples choose to spend time together doing fun activities on dates, they are more likely to establish a sense of humor in their relationship that can be beneficial later on.

“….such playfulness is extremely good for relationships. What does it require? A willingness to turn toward another’s sense of silliness, give oneself over to the moment, and have a little bit of fun.” –John Gottman, The Relationship Cure

• On dates, couples have the chance to discuss their hopes, dreams, and plans for the future. Sometimes, talking about these things can encourage one spouse to make a change in their life or pursue one of their own dreams.

“Most of us have more potential than we will ever develop. What holds us back is often courage. A love spouse can supply that all-important catalyst.” –Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages

Bibliography

 Chapman, Gary. The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate. Chicago, IL: Northfield, 1997.

Gottman, John, and Joan DeClaire. The Relationship Cure: A Five-step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships. New York: Crown, 2002.

Larson, Aaron. Great Dates Houston. July 2015. 28 July 2015. http://greatdateshouston.blogspot.com/